Day 185: The Sun Is Shining Again

As much as I love the storms, I also love what it feels like after the storms have passed.  The air is clean, the sun is brighter, and it just feels crisp outside even though it should be a bit too warm for the air to actually feel crisp.  I think that the electrical charge of the lightning has something to do with that…ions and all.  Everything just feels lighter, including me.  It’s a very good feeling.  I feel like setting goals and actually meeting them…not procrastination.  All of that is in spite of having a terrible toothache.  And why do I have that?  Cowardice, pure and simple.  I have an awful phobia when it comes to dentists and any kind of dental procedure.  I have to have nitrous just to have a cavity filled.  This isn’t some random phobia…I earned it.  When I was 17, our family dentist was performing what should have been a run of the mill root canal, because he was addicted to pain medicine, it went wrong.  First, it started at 7:30am and I didn’t get out of that room until after 3:00pm.  I was on nitrous the entire time.  And that root canal caused me issues for years.  It took 8 years for me to go back to a dentist.  And he was awesome.  It was through him that I found that Dr. Thorsen was a drug addict and had killed himself by overdosing on pain meds.  Being a diabetic, I am already predisposed to complications when it comes to dental procedures so even though my new dentist was beyond excellent,  every procedure had complications. When I had my 2 wisdom teeth extracted, I had dry sockets continuously for almost 2 weeks because they wouldn’t heal. Then I had to go to an endontist to have that original root canal redone…3 times. He drilled in through the top of the crown twice then he finally had to go into it from the bottom. So, more dental trauma. All went pretty well from that point on but after my dentist retired, I had some more bad experiences. But now I’m with a good dentist so I trust his referral to the oral surgeon. And now, whether I trusted the referral or not, I have no choice. At least they use anesthesia so I’ll be out! I can do that! But I am not getting the implant because I don’t want to risk it. My bottom teeth are a little crowded so I thing I’ll be okay with the teeth spreading out. Now the dread sets in but it’s hurting so badly that I will almost be relieved to get it done. Almost.

About Donna Heilman

I am a writer that lives in the Dallas-Ft. Worth Metroplex with my husband, 3 dogs, and 6 cats. I am currently working on my novel, Rapture, as well as writing poetry and some short non-fiction. I am honestly writing this blog to feel more connected with other creative people.
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