Day 68: Is There a Method to the Madness?

When I am at work, my desk looks like a paper factory exploded.  I have stacks of paper and files everywhere because that is what I deal with 99% of the time…paperwork, which I have no time to file.  And it really doesn’t bother me that my desk and credenza are cluttered.  If someone needs something, I can pull it out, no problem.  But my writing haven, that’s a totally different story.  It bothers me.  A lot.  That’s why I’ve been working to get it less cluttered.  Don’t ask me what the difference is between my work office and my writing office because I honestly do not know.  Maybe I just like that clean slate feel that my writing area has.  If I’m thinking about the extra notebooks, books, files, papers, etc…, then I’m not writing.  I can concentrate on the writing rather than looking over at something that catches my eye and distracts me from the real reason I’m there.  I get involved in busy work…moving this here, filing that, reading something else…and my brain isn’t even close to writing a single word.  I’ve lost my focus.  So, yeah, maybe it is that clean slate thing.  I try to not have any kind of “toys” lying around because I will just sit there and play with them…anything to avoid that blank page.  I know that’s not true of all writers though because I have seen photos of the desks of some of the most prolific writers and they have toys sitting there yet they turn out books one after the other.  I know that my ADHD plays a part in this so I can’t beat myself up too badly.  But, at the same time, I can’t be the only ADHD writer out there.  Others get past it so why can’t I?  Well, I’m working on it.  I can’t let that keep getting the best of me.  I am stronger and more determined than that.  I’ve identified at least part of the problem so now all I have to do is fix it.  All you can do is identify problems as they pop up and then move on to the next one and address it.  We aren’t machines and our brains don’t have chips in them that limit us to only one task.  Our brains demand to be entertained and engaged.  We just have to learn how to do that without interfering with our creative goals.  So, maybe the next time my brain gets a little rowdy, I’ll tell it a story.               

About Donna Heilman

I am a writer that lives in the Dallas-Ft. Worth Metroplex with my husband, 2 dogs, and 10 cats. I am currently working on my novel, Rapture, as well as writing poetry and some short non-fiction. I am honestly writing this blog to feel more connected with other creative people.
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