Day 58: Changes

Changes…some are good and some are not.  I personally do not deal well with change.  Even when it’s a change for the better, it still takes me a while to adjust.  But, for the most part, I like things to be status quo.  I have been working on my little writing haven for a few months and I’ve been making some changes and, for once, I am loving it.  Maybe it’s because I’m making it totally and completely mine.  And even though I still have an overabundance of crafting supplies in here, this room is all about my writing and things related to it.  It is becoming so “me” that I get a thrill just walking in here.  Before this, I wrote at my desk in the bedroom or on the bed but that bit of writing space was shared with the bedroom and Rick and the cats and the dogs.  But when I got serious again about my writing, I wanted MY space!  I had already claimed this room for my crafting so it was the obvious choice.  I always call it my New Orleans room because that was my decorating inspiration.  Now, it is Donna’s Writing Haven.  It is private.  It has two huge windows with nice views.  The only thing I’d wish for is more storage but, I’m making do with what I have.  But I can blast my music…today’s top tracks are courtesy of Counting Crows…stuck on A Long December.  Feeling a bit nostalgic today, I guess.   Next, I think I’ll let the Red Hot Chili Peppers serenade me.  Sorry…music makes my mind wander.  I guess that’s why I like to listen to it when I write.  It’s like an oil that greases the wheels that spin in my mind.  Back to my haven…I can make it as sparkly and, excuse my 60’s choice of words here, as totally far out as I want.  It’s an eclectic mix for sure.  And I love it.  So, I guess I’m not as completely against change as I sometimes think I am.  When I was a child, I didn’t always feel secure because I never felt that I fit in anywhere so I had my imagination to keep me company.  And I had my world as organized as I possibly could and when a change would come, I felt vulnerable and I didn’t like that feeling.  Plus, I’d have to reorder my life anew.  So, I suppose that change, in general, represents a threat of sorts to my security.  I wonder how others react to and feel about change.  Is this just me or is it more widespread than that?  The strangest thing though is that when I am feeling vulnerable and insecure, my writing flows a little better.  I guess that’s because I’ve used it throughout my life for comfort and to pull me out of this world into the world of my imagination where I was safe.  Do you use your writing, even fiction or poetry, to escape or to feel certain ways or to even exorcize your demons? Writing, to me anyway, is more than just putting words on paper.  It’s a therapy of sorts as well as an escape.  There are things that just seem to need to be worked out on paper like math problems…solve the problem and show your work.  It might not make sense to everyone just what those words mean but there could people out there that do get it and they are who we are writing for when we do our exorcisms.  Someone else has the same demons and through our works, they just might find some answers while also escaping into the worlds we created.  So solve that problem and show your work! 

“Any writer worth his salt writes to please himself.  It’s a self-exploratory operation that is endless.  An exorcism of not necessarily his demon, but of his divine discontent.” ~ Harper Lee            

About Donna Heilman

I am a writer that lives in Irving, TX with my husband, 3 dogs, and 5 cats. I am currently working on my novel, Rapture, as well as writing poetry and some short non-fiction. I am honestly writing this blog to feel more connected with other creative people.
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2 Responses to Day 58: Changes

  1. I agree and I agree. I abhor change. It frightens me and is hard for me. My writing is my escape. From my teens years of soul searching poetry to my adult journaling to my senior blogging, writing is my therapy. I get it.
    Gentle hugs,
    Lauren

    Liked by 1 person

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